The Elder Must Not be Self-Willed

Chapter 16

We already addressed the issue of being above reproach, so we will move to this idea of the self-will. We should understand that the modern liberal theological rubbish about man needing to love himself before he can love others is entirely without biblical support. Nowhere in God’s word are we told that a man must love himself. As a matter of fact we are told that one must deny himself if he is to be like Christ (Matt. 16:34; Mk. 8:34, Luke 9:23). Apparently this is a really important truth because Matthew, Mark, and Luke recorded it in their gospel accounts. It is self-love (self-esteem), that causes one to be self-willed. When one spends his waking hours thinking about how he can get the things out of life that make him comfortable and leave him with a feeling of having been successful, he has no time to be concerned about the needs of God’s flock.

I saw the most incredible example of this trait just the other day as I sat in on a conference with a teen-aged girl, her mother and father, her doctor, and a couple of other teachers and administrators. This 15 year old girl turned on the tears and wailing sobs of distress every time she was confronted by teachers about her lies and cheating. Her doctor, a local female medical doctor, rubbed away the tears from her eyes while consoling her for her inappropriate behavior, suggesting that maybe she should see the problem from a different perspective. Seven full grown adults sat around picking their noses while this fifteen year old juvenile delinquent put on the most blatant example of self-will I think I have ever seen. It took all I had to refrain from laughing hysterically.

While we don’t ever have to worry about that girl becoming an Elder in God’s church, her behavior is a prime example of what an Elder cannot be. It is also an example of a father who could not be an Elder in God’s church as long as he refuses to take his rightful place as the head of that family and discipline that child appropriately. She is an embarrassment to her family and any who have the unpleasant opportunity to watch her throw her temper tantrums every time she get appropriately disciplined by any adult for behaving like the juvenile delinquent she is. And all of this is because her father has refused to be a godly leader in his home. The Elder in God’s church cannot be self-willed.